You are pregnant and you have been strongly hoping to have a boy or a girl. In fact, you have been hoping so much for the outcome of the gender you want, you strongly believe that you are having the boy or the girl of your dreams. And you are crediting this feeling on a strong intuitive feeling. However, it is a known fact that strong desires can be mixed with intuition since your emotions are controlling how you really feel. Yet at the same time, you are nervous about that 20-week ultrasound because deep down you are afraid to find out that you are having a baby that is the opposite gender of what you are hoping for. And, that day comes, you ask the ultrasound technician what you are having, and you receive the answer that you were not hoping for! In fact, you are extremely let down that you had found out that the baby you are carrying is the opposite gender of what you have been dreaming out. You are very depressed about it yet at the same time, you feel guilty about the fact you are feeling this way because you also know that there are plenty of other couples that would be happy to conceive who are struggling with infertility. However, invalidating your feelings is not the answer either. You have the right to be disappointed even though you are well aware that there are other couples out there that would be happy to have a baby of their own who are struggling. Fortunately, there are ways you can be able to manage your feelings due to learning about having the gender of the baby that you did not want to have. Let’s go over how to deal with those gender disappointment feelings right now.
Accept your feelings and talk to someone – You have to acknowledge that you are let down after finding out that you are carrying the baby that is the opposite gender that you had been hoping for. Burying those feelings will only hurt you in the long run. Talk to your partner, your friends, your doctor, anyone who will listen. And in order to prevent anyone from telling you to feel grateful that you had gotten pregnant in the first place, be sure to start off by acknowledging that you know you are lucky that you were able to get pregnant in the first place since many others would give their eye teeth. But after that, share what you feel and don’t hold back.
Allow yourself time – As cliche as this sounds, it is true. Time does heal and as the days progress, you will find that you are not feeling nearly as disappointed as you did when you had initially found out that you were having the baby that was the opposite gender of what you were originally hoping to have.
Question yourself why you are disappointed – You need to dig deep into this one because you need to find out what is behind your disappointment. Perhaps it has to do with a bad experience from the past? Do you fear that you will not be a good mom to a child that is the opposite gender of what you were hoping for? If you are having a boy but desperately wanted a girl, does the relationship with your father or brothers have anything to do with it? If you are having a girl but desperately wanted a boy, does the relationship you have with your mother or sisters have anything to do with that? Whatever the reason is, you will need to find it and once you do, then work with it.
Take small steps – It will take some time for you to accept the gender of the baby you are having, however, you need to make an effort to get there. You can go and buy an outfit for the baby that is appropriate for the gender that you are having. Go and jot down some baby names. And, if you had your heart set on a gender-neutral name, then that is also a good way to go. With that said, gender disappointment is very real. And, you should never judge yourself for experiencing those feelings. Having your hopes dashed is never easy regardless of the situation. However, if you are struggling to come to terms with this after a lot of time has elapsed then you will want to seek help as you may be dealing with depression or anxiety which is worsening the situation.
A new life develops in you, your body changes, and your hormones are your allies but your enemies, and, looking at the distance, you are alone in this journey, everything depends on you. Dr. Ruxandra Dumitrescu, primary obstetrician-gynecologist , helped us to compile a list of what you need to do on the job, a list that you can check what you have done and what you have to follow, according to the quarter.
What do you have to do in the first trimester of pregnancy?
The first thing you have to do when you suspect you’re pregnant is setting up your first medical checkup. For this you have to choose a doctor, which is why you should ask for as many recommendations as possible. The first check will be a physical examination plus a blood and urine test. Most doctors also perform a transvaginal ultrasound to accurately determine the presence of pregnancy. It is also recommended to perform the TORCH test if you have not already done so during the preconception period.
Make your plan for a healthy prenatal diet.
During pregnancy, it is extremely important to feed yourself with healthy and nutritious foods. Even if you are eating for two, you only need 300 calories in addition to the time before, but they have to be healthy calories. Beware of food to be avoided in pregnancy, as well as other toxic factors. And great attention to weight. Take a look at what is the ideal weight surplus in pregnancy trying to conceive a boy.
Get your vitamins!
If you do not already have a prenatal vitamin complex, it’s time to start doing it. Your doctor will recommend the product that suits you, depending on the diet you are following, but it will certainly contain folic acid and iron. Your prenatal vitamins should contain at least 0.4 mg of folic acid and at least 27 mg of iron.
Pay attention to what you should not do!
In addition to having to make some adjustments to the diet, there is also a list of things you should give up, especially hazardous substances such as tobacco, alcohol or drugs. Also, be careful if you have pets, especially cats. It’s time to stop taking them, letting someone else do this because the cat can be toxoplasmosis.
Do not give up on sports!
Many pregnant women do sports because they help them manage their weight and emotional status, but they can also prevent certain pains. But moderation and consistency are the key. Generally, in the first trimester you can continue pre-pregnancy physical activity as long as you avoid lifting weights, accidental falls and injuries, excessive heat or humidity, or abdominal exercises. Accelerated walking or swimming are excellent sports for pregnant women. And do not forget about kegel exercises .
Be careful how you handle pregnancy symptoms!
Some women overtake the first trimester of pregnancy without suffering any symptoms or experiencing very few. Unfortunately, other women suffer from extremely unpleasant symptoms such as acute fatigue, nausea, breast pain, mood swings, frequent urination, or constipation, all common in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy. The good news is that all these symptoms are absolutely normal and you have no reason to worry about. The bad news is that you are not really allowed to take medication to relieve symptoms and it is quite difficult to manage them, especially at work. Think that many women feel much more energetic in the second quarter. Hang up there!
You will constantly feel that you want to take a nap because fatigue is the common symptom that challenges you and requires you especially in the first trimester. This is because your body works hard to build the placenta. That’s why you have to sleep at least eight hours a night and, if possible, you can still sleep during the day for more energy.
Change your wardrobe!
Even if you do not see your belly in the first 12 weeks and there will be no major changes in body size, there are a few adjustments to make. These are especially intimate lingerie, especially bras. But it would not hurt to make your plan for the rest of the wardrobe.
Who do you tell him?
When you find out you’re pregnant, you want to shout in the big mouth and let everyone know. However, many women, out of superstition, choose not to do so until they have passed the first trimester. Did you decide who you would announce?
Try to relax.
The risk of spontaneous abortion is quite common in the first trimester of pregnancy, as well as the risk of other complications. If you are worried, take time and inform yourself of signs of possible complications, but do not just focus on it. Stay positive because this is the healthiest thing for a child.
What are you doing on the job? It does list in the second trimester of pregnancy
At this stage, you probably go to a doctor every four weeks. It’s time for routine tests such as glucose that cause the risk of gestational diabetes. You may also be offered the option of genetic tests such as those for determining the risk of a genetic or chromosomal abnormality, but also a double test or a triple test. Together with the physician and the results of other tests, the need for amniocentesis can be determined . Depending on the recommended tests, consider what each person assumes and how much it costs, because some are not at all cheap and certainly not reimbursed by the Health Insurance House. Usually, during the second trimester of pregnancy, you can find the child’s sex, most likely after the 16th week of pregnancy.
Keep a diary.
Many pregnancy symptoms such as burns or digestive problems may be related to the foods you consume and usually occur during the second trimester of pregnancy. A food diary can help you figure out which food is bad for you. A diary can also help keep your weight under control, but also make sure you get all the necessary nutrients. Do not think that you put on writing, because there are many mobile applications that are extremely useful in this respect.
Sports exercises change slightly.
If you have been doing sports since the first trimester of pregnancy, you can continue to do it, especially since physical exercise has multiple advantages for your physical and mental condition, for weight control and for avoiding other problems and complications. However, with the doctor’s consent, you should make some adjustments related to the intensity and frequency of exercises. Your stomach is beginning to grow, and you will not be able to ask so much.
Make a financial plan.
Raising a child is expensive and becoming a parent implies new financial responsibilities. You start to make a budget to find out how much you can spend every month on the baby’s stuff, for there is plenty to buy, from the stroller and the crib to all sorts of small items. Later, after birth, there will still be quite large expenses. It is said that a responsible parent makes his plan much farther, including life insurance, studies or savings.
Make your appointment with the dentist.
Pregnant women are more prone to dental problems such as caries, gingival bleeding or infections. And it does not necessarily mean a poor dental hygiene, but the needs of a fetus that supplies you with everything you have the best. Therefore, a dentist’s advice should be sought.
The first shopping
It’s never too early for such shopping. Time is fast and it’s good to get up early shopping. The first on the list should be the baby cot or another object the baby can use in the first few weeks of life. Then you can think of the stroller, weighing machine, sterilizer, etc. Get started early so you can study your offers and look for recommendations because the baby product market is full and you need to know how to see behind each product’s marketing.
Make your plan for maternity leave.
Or paternity. You will surely make the calculations and choose who will go on holiday with the baby. If you have not announced so far, it’s time to do it, so the employer knows you’re pregnant and find solutions for the time you’re on holiday. In addition, keep an eye on what rights you have , why you need it, and what steps you need to take. Think about how long you want to stay with your baby, how much you can do and what solutions you choose then. Honey, grandparents, crèche?
Start making a list of children’s names
Finding a child’s name can be extremely fun. Some parents know what names they will put on their baby before it even exists. Others fail to agree until the ninth month. If you do not have your name yet, you’ll probably talk a lot about this topic because it is extremely important and you have to choose very well.
Do not forget about romantic encounters.
You should keep in mind that it is extremely important to spend quality time with your partner. The task will make important changes in both your life and your life, and while the anticipation of the new income is moving, it is important that you also allocate time.
What are you and what not to eat?
Probably one of the most important tips, once you get pregnant, is to be careful about how much you eat. The poetry of “now eat for two” is totally untrue, although, personally , it is extremely tempting. Dr. Ruxandra Dumitrescu, a primary obstetrician in gynecology, recommends that during pregnancy, she is pregnant to consume an extra 200 calories daily from the initial diet. But this is especially true in the third trimester of pregnancy. Until then it is perfect if you manage to stay at the same calorie count. 200 calories means two pieces of whole bread with butter or a small glass of orange juice.
Many women use pregnancy as an excuse to eat a lot. This is just a matter of extra pounds that you may never get rid of and weight complications because of your weight. The essential idea should be the quality of the diet, not the quantity.
In pregnancy you need to have a balanced diet
You will find this phrase everywhere. It’s not marketing, it’s probably an aggressive way to make us realize that balanced diet is the key to our health and our children, not just in the burden.
How can you help develop brain and vision
At the end of the 12th week of pregnancy, your doctor will advise you to switch from Femibion 1 to Femibion 2. Why is it important to follow your advice? Because from now on until the end of breastfeeding, it must ensure that the optimal level of folic acid and DHA is reached, ie Omega 3. Femibion 2 contains DHA, Metafolin® and folic acid as well as vitamin B complex, vitamin C and E and iodine. This is the period in which brain and vision develop, and DHA is an essential fatty acid at this time, given that 70% of brain development occurs when the fetus is in the mother’s belly and only 15% during the first year of life. At the 26th week of pregnancy, his eyes begin to open, so the eyelids are closed. Now is the time when the fetus begins to see the light through the mother’s abdomen. During this period, pregnant women feel the increase in fetal activity, and this is explained by the fact that the younger brain is more and more developed and generates more and more answers.
A higher IQ
If the optimal DHA intake is not now assured, your child may have less visual acuity. Because you are the only source of DHA, including communication will be influenced by this aspect, with reduced communication abilities being also related to the low level of DHA of the mother during pregnancy. Studies show that DHA, administered daily from the 2nd trimester of pregnancy to the end of the lactation period, contributes to better motor and eye coordination at the age of 2.5 years, improves visual acuity, increases retinal sensitivity, improves IQ of the child.